"The Men Who Killed Me"

Douglas & McIntyre

D&M Publishers Inc.

Introduction

Like all books, this one began with an idea. As colleagues at a women's rights organization in The Hague, Anne-Marie and Sandra worked closely on a variety of issues related to sexual violence in war.

Rwanda became a frequent topic of conversation as our friendship grew. The war-ravaged nation, known as the "country of a thousand hills," had, in effect, become Anne-Marie's second home; not only had she visited and worked in Rwanda over the years, but she had developed a deep friendship with a young Rwandan woman who had survived traumatic sexual violence during the genocide. We discussed the possibility of creating a venue for this woman and others like her to bring forth their experiences. Between 250,000 and 500,000 women and girls were raped in this tiny country between April and July 1994. Despite numerous accounts of the genocide, including coverage about perpetrators standing trial before the International Criminal Tribunal for Rwanda, the voices of rape survivors were notably absent.

In 2007, a few days before Christmas, we visited Solace Ministries, a survivor-run grassroots organization in Kigali that works with widows and orphans of the genocide, offering food, housing, hiv medication, counselling, income-generating projects and spiritual care. We were amazed by both the strength of the women we talked to and the invaluable support they provided for each other as survivors with a common bond. We decided then we would do whatever we could to share their stories. Our friend Samer, who was in Rwanda doing development work, suggested that photographs could bring another dimension to survivors' accounts of their experiences.

After months of working on the book abroad--Anne-Marie in The Hague and Sandra and Samer in Toronto--we returned to Rwanda in the summer of 2008 to complete the testimonials. We interviewed each survivor on three or four occasions. This approach worked well, since it lessened the trauma for survivors and gave us time to review the testimonials and ask follow-up questions. At each stage of the process, we obtained consent from the survivors, assuring them they could end the interview or withdraw from the book at any time. During the last session with each person, we read the entire testimonial aloud for their approval. All but one survivor we interviewed decided to continue with the project, but three requested that their faces not be recognizable in their photographs.

Throughout the interviews, the awe-inspiring staff of Solace Ministries were on hand to assist with translation and, if necessary, with counselling. With them we attended a gacaca, a traditional court that adjudicates crimes committed during the Rwandan genocide, to support a colleague in testifying against a former neighbour who had murdered her husband.

One afternoon towards the end of the process, we were packing up to leave the interview room when a tall, elegant woman approached us. She pleaded for us to listen to her story. She wanted the world to know the terrible things that had been done to her, she said. With a steady voice and a distant gaze, she told us about the unimaginable violence she had witnessed and experienced, then shared her fears for the future of her children. At that moment, we realized the book was already having a positive impact. These survivors felt that others cared enough to listen.

Once the interviews were complete, Samer travelled across Rwanda photographing survivors in their homes and areas where they experienced the genocide. What he saw shocked him. Most survivors live in rundown shacks with no electricity or running water. Some still live within walking distance of those who committed violence against them. Many lost their entire families in the genocide and so live a great distance from any support.

In addition, a horrifying 70 per cent of survivors of sexual violence in Rwanda are now hiv positive. They are often stigmatized because of their condition, and the disease makes it difficult for many people to earn an income. By sharing their testimonials, these survivors--sixteen women and one man--strive to keep the memory of the genocide alive. They urge the international community to refuse to permit such atrocities to happen again. The violence they suffered battered their bodies and extinguished their dreams. Incredibly, however, these survivors stand defiant. In the face of all odds, they have opted to bring to light the crimes that rape survivors have historically endured in silence. We feel privileged to have witnessed their immense courage, their hope and their will to continue. They have taught us how important it is to remember our common humanity.

The authors' proceeds from the sales of The Men Who Killed Me will be donated to Mukomeze (Kinyarwanda for "empower her"), a sponsorship program for girls and women raped during the genocide in Rwanda. In this way, we hope to help not only the survivors interviewed here but the thousands of others who were not. The women and young man featured in this book have profoundly changed our lives. We hope that their stories will do the same for you.

Anne-Marie de Brouwer

Sandra Ka Hon Chu

Samer Muscati